Totes Adorable

Some of my friends and family have alleged that I am addicted to tote bags. Sure, I tuck small totes into larger ones to disguise the terrifying true scope of my collection. (Why? Doesn't everyone?) Yeah, I've started squirreling them away in random drawers throughout the apartment so that Jason can never fling open a single cabinet and force me to confront the evidence. But, see, lots of them serve distinct purposes: the one from the Vancouver Aquarium doesn't even count, because it's really just a grocery bag. And the Stephen Colbert one is perfect for library books. Don't worry about it.

If there's one thing that I love even more than tote bags, it's a good pun. (Or even a bad pun. Pretty much any pun.) So, these West Elm charmers are total two-fers! They're the perfect size for stashing everyday essentials, and emblazoned with clever-but-annoying catchphrases (my trademark). For example: "Ain't no thing but a chicken wing," "Wet your plants," "Totes ma goats." Sold...if I can find a place to put them.